we wish you a very merry

a very merry christmas!

Merry Christmas everyone. Hope is was wonderful.

apparently steering wheels are for eating

christmas bark how to

Today Grayson and I made christmas bark. I'm not a baker so instead i dip things in chocolate during the holidays! It's super easy and even more delicious.

We thought we would share.

Christmas Bark

You will need baking chocolates. You can find them at the craft store, i got mine at the amish market. Some grocery stores may carry them as well. You will also need candy canes. I find that the smaller ones are easier to smash up. Make sure they are peppermint flavored. 

Line a pan with foil or wax paper. You don't need a pan but it prevents it from flowing onto your counter if you over pour. 

Melt the chocolates in the microwave. Put it on 50% and heat in one minute increments. Stir between each heating. Make sure you don't over cook the chocolate. It will become lumpy and taste funny. Smash up the candy canes (i used a mug). 

Pour the chocolate onto the paper, use a spatula to push it around. Don't worry about it being totally even in all spots. 

Then pour the next layer of chocolate on, spreading to the edge of the bottom layer. For this particular batch i used mint chocolate on the bottom layer. I wanted to swirl the design so i would know which flavor this was. You can use the spatula or a fork. 

While the chocolate is still hot, sprinkle the candy cane throughout. Some people prefer more candy cane, some prefer less. There is no right or wrong. 

My second batch i used white chocolate on the bottom and milk chocolate on top. For this one i did not want to crate a design so i waited for the bottom layer to dry before i added the top layer. Then i sprinkled in the candy. 

Once the chocolate is totally dry break apart the chocolate into chunks. 

Grayson says- that is how you make christmas bark!

Grayson wasn't the only one by my side.

Pancake & Cherrio helped too, and by helped I mean tried to get treats the whole time. 

We hope you enjoy your christmas bark! 

chocolate leftoevers

the whole christmas bark thing had grayson exhausted so he took a nap!

i found myself with extra chocolates so i opened up the cabinet and started searching for more things to dip!

I dipped pretzels, apricots (this may sound strange but try it, its wonderful!), banana chips and almonds. I called the almond clumps reindeer poop. I just swirled them around in the bowl and dropped clusters onto the paper. 

I'm pretty sure anything dipped in chocolate would be awesome. 

Grayson may have been napping but these two did not leave my side. 

Merry Christmas and Happy Dipping!

the most wonderful time of the year

one more week till christmas! 

snow!

we've had lots of days where it flurried but nothing ever stuck around. friday though it did! so i bundled grayson up and took him outside to enjoy his first snow. 

he wasn't really sure what to make of it. 

he kept looking up at the sky and making faces because all the snow would land on his little cheekies. 

it was nice to see a little white stuff but i really really hope we don't have another winter like last year! 

that would not be fun. 

don we now our gay apparel

Tis the season for holiday parties. And with holiday parties comes holiday sweaters! 

Even grayson was sporting his best outfit. 

our lovely hosts

our fancy fire. 

then came time for the chinese gift exchange

Yes that is a pregnancy test she has in her hand. Best gift ever. 

seriously exciting gifts!

grayson was disgusted by the whole thing. 

happy holidays! 

the beginning of the end

I am days away from no longer breastfeeding. Days. I actually had intended to stop at the end of the month but i had no idea how quickly milk actually dries up.


I have mixed feelings about it. On the one hand i loath breastfeeding. It's been a struggle from day one. Grayson was in the nicu when he was born and so the IV made him not want to eat. I had lactation consultants there several times a day trying to help me. He got more bottle then breast and because hes lazy smart he figured out bottle was way less effort for him and refused to breastfeed.


So in comes the pump. Every three hours I had to remember to go isolate myself in a room for a good 20 minutes to pump. If i was going out, the pump was there. Public bathrooms, weddings, cars, you name it.


I felt like i was constantly drenched in breastmilk. I was always full and leaky. The rare times I could get grayson to breastfeed he insisted on using a shield. He would fill the thing up then knock it off so everything spilled down on me.


I know some people love breastfeeding and found it as a bonding time but for me it was a battle. He screamed and kicked at me for 45 minutes one time because he just did not want to nurse. He wanted the bottle. So even though it was so much more work, i just pumped. At least he was getting the benefits of breastfeeding.


That was until my milk supply went away overnight. I went from having an awesome supply of 6-8 oz a pumping session to only 3oz, if i was lucky. This happened mid-september, just as i was getting ready to go back to work. After consulting both the lactation consultant and the midwife i tried eating disgusting oatmeal, downing the mother's tea, fenugreek, blessed thistle, power pumping. Pretty much every trick in the book. Instead of getting better it just got worse though.


My supply just kept going down. I even rented a hospital grade pump that i've been using the last two months. Nothing. It didn't help that as i got less milk i got more stressed. I'd just end up crying and Mark would look at me like i was a nutcase. Everyone was frustrated. I was lucky if he got two bottles a day.


So i decided 6 months was the cut off. I was done, in every way. I started taking away pumping sessions little by little and in a weeks time i'm down to pumping once every 36 hours. I didn't realize how easy it would be to stop. I feel kind of sad about it, that i can no longer provide for him. The whole thing made me feel like a total failure though, i just couldn't do it anymore.


I do wish i could have kept going, as much as i hated it. Next time I will do things a bit differently. For now though, this is the end.